Blessed with the Best

"Friends are those rare people who ask how you are and then wait for the answer." 

Putting it simply, that's all friends are: people that care about you. Easy, right?

Not so much.

Friends are more complex than that.

In a world where efficiency is the norm, people are too engaged in their own lives to take interest in others. They watch life pass them by without forming deep connections with others.

So if you're lucky enough to have a true friend, cherish that friendship as if it were a million dollars--because friendships are worth even more than that.

They are priceless. 

When I was younger, I didn't realize the value of friendship. My sister bet me that she had more friends than I did, and the crazy sisters we are, we each created a list of all our friends.

I couldn't bear it if my sister had more friends, so I started writing down acquaintances' names, as if they were my friends too. The person from whom I borrowed a pencil in math class became my "friend." The girl I accidentally bumped into in the hallway became my "friend." Anyone who had been a stranger yesterday became my "friend" the day I created that list.

It sounds ridiculous that I was so desperate I made up fake friends. But surprisingly, I'm not the only one guilty of such actions.

I'll bet every social media user has added a stranger as a friend at one point. Just think about it. It's not cool to "only" have 100 friends, so why not just add anyone that sends you a friend request?

And if that's not enough, why not just send friend requests to random people--that cute girl you creeped on; that hot boy you've been stalking; heck, even an old man who claims he's Santa Claus--the more, the merrier!

But which of these "friends" knows your true story, not just the one your edited profile picture tells? 

Which of these "friends" can put their arm around you in public and proudly declare, "We're friends"? 

And which of these "friends" will actually cry at your funeral because something is missing in their lives without you? 

The attractive stranger you added on Facebook sure won't.

So in all honesty, quality beats quantity any day. If you have one true friend, then you're golden.

One true friend is a diamond while one fake friend is a pile of dirt. 

Math lied to you; sometimes, one actually is greater than one hundred. Because what are one hundred fake friends? An even bigger pile of dirt!

Unfortunately, we don't see people as diamonds or dirt when they become our friends, so we never know who's our true friend. In fact, finding true friends is even harder than solving a Rubix cube because there are no algorithms for making friends.

The complexity increases when you realize that everyone's perspective on friendship is different. 

To me, friendship is a two-way street. I could try to wordily explain myself, but I would still fail to get my point across. So instead, here's a quote that sums up my opinion: "Friendship is like a rubber band held at two ends by both people. When one lets go, it hurts the other."

Only your real friends will hold on to that rubber band because they treasure your friendship. They treasure it enough not to jeopardize it by hurting you intentionally. What makes them true friends is that they are loyal to your face and also behind your back.

In the chaos we know as high school, I have witnessed some seemingly perfect friendships crumble. What you think is a friendship may actually be a mixture of jealousy, ego, backstabbing, and hatred...and voilà! 

You have a frenemy!

The glory of friendship has been blemished by these fake friends. One day, they treat you like the Queen of England; the next day, they gossip about you behind your back.

It's not like I've never been a fake friend. I'm ashamed to admit I'm guilty of this, too. 

A few years ago, my friend and I decided to be honest with each other. After all, honesty is an important component of friendship, right?

Well...not always.

My friend suggested that we both admit our pet peeves about each other. So that day, my friend and I told each other what we didn't like about the other, and then we congratulated ourselves for being such perfect, honest friends. 

May I please have a standing ovation for extreme stupidity?

If you have a chance to tell your friends what you don't like about them, what would you say? 

What my friend said to me shocked me. She admitted she didn't like how I put random bobby pins in my hair where they didn't need to be. She also found the way I ate pistachios extremely weird.

I'm not kidding here--some people judge you based on how you eat pistachios.

Wonderful.

To be honest, I don't remember what I said about her. And I don't even want to know, because whatever it was, I'm ashamed.

But the past is the past, and over time, I've discovered the meaning of friendship.

Instead of telling my friends what bothers me about them, I now tell them how they inspire me. 

At our lunch table, we started a ritual my sophomore year that we still continue. On the last day of each semester, we go around the table, and each person shares what she likes about everyone sitting at that table.

Those twenty-five minutes lunch periods are the most beautifully spent moments of my life. Amidst the dramatic hurricane of school, we all experience the "eye of the storm" bliss.

Nothing is more peaceful than knowing you have friends who genuinely like you for who you are, not for who they want you to be.

If you have a chance to tell your friends what you like about them, what would you say? 

Whatever thoughts came to your mind, make them reality. Sometimes it's not just the thought that counts; you have to act on it. You do have that chance to tell your friends what you admire about them. 

So make it happen!

I love all of my friends to death, and I know I am the luckiest person in the world for being blessed with real friends.

After all, real friends make life worthwhile. :)